Friday, February 13, 2015

Blood Mania - 1970

IMDb tell me Blood Mania is about "A sex-crazed nympho helps speed along her father's death so she can use the inheritance to help out her depraved boyfriend."  Okay, yeah, I agree with that.  See the thing was that I could not find a way to really sum up what happened in this movie.  Now this is partially my fault; I watched it on 2-3 separate days, the last day (today, right now) I watched the 45 minutes that was left and I did so while slightly drunk.

So the sex-crazed nympho is in this case Victoria.  Victoria is an odd looking little woman, and though she's not particularly sex-crazed, she does have sex.  And what is a nympho really?  Cause she's not like super sexual in this.  I think maybe perchance somebody was trying to write a review to entice people to come to the movie.  Maybe.  Perchance.

It plays out kind of how you'd expect, she kills her dad, boyfriend Craig is scared by this, then the dad's will doesn't leave her what she wanted, in fact it leaves her long-absent sister Gail with the good shit, so she must murder Gail, and what have you.  It's all very connect the dots.  There is blood, there is nudity, there is a mildly confusing plot.  It could be my fault, again.

The ending was a big WTF moment for me.  I'm actually going to go online and figure out what the ending was cause I could not tell you what happened exactly.

Now here's a weird fucking thing right here.  IMDb also tells me main girl Maria De Aragon (she played the sex crazed nympho) was Greedo in Star Wars?!!!!!  WTF?!!  According to IMDb again, 3 people played Greedo, one as the voice of him so two others, including Maria here, did something apparently involving Greedo.  I want to know what she did with Greedo!  That's actually pretty fucking cool!  Okay according to Wookiepedia (stupid name) she did some close up pickup shots as Greedo.  Huh.  Interesting.

Well, as if you can't tell already I don't have tons to say about this movie.  It was very, very average.  It wasn't great, it wasn't bad, it barely held my interest, it's a great movie to leave the room but not pause because you don't really care if you miss anything.  I recommend beer or having friends to watch it with.  I also recommend not starting a horror grindhouse movie blog.

Ooooooh!  I cannot finish this blog without mentioning the horrible shirt the guy had on.  Oh it was just SO 70's.  Grey, with no buttons, but collared.  It had a deep V neckline, giant collars.  It was baggy as all hell, tucked into pants with no belt, and it had really awkwardly tight wrists.  What the fuck is that called, the section of a men's shirt that's the wrist?  I don't know.  Oh the shirt was fucking glorious.  The movie practically gets a star for that.

Well, 2 stars, who knows, who cares.  Enjoy, muchachoes.

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