Monday, December 7, 2015

Top Line - 1988

I'm back to the mode where it seems I forget these movies as soon as I finish them.  That's one thing I will give my recent review 984.  At least I could remember the plot despite the fact I watched it before this movie, and I watched part of a movie after this one too.  Yet, 984 was still something I remembered.  This movie, I typed in the title, I went to the IMDb page, and I looked at it thinking, "did I watch this? maybe I didn't finish this one...?"  But after doing some research, I found this picture that made me remember:

I'm not going to call this a Terminator rip off, because just having cyborgs isn't enough to warrant the term rip-off.  Come on people, there are plenty of movies that take influence from others.  If every movie is ripping off Terminator that has a cyborg in it, then every movie with a detective is ripping off Sherlock Holmes, or like every movie with a stabbing scene is ripping off Psycho, etc.  The plot had virtually no similarities.

Actually, this had a lot more in common with the George Lucas bastard child movie Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull.  Because it's kind of a similar feeling action adventure movie about an adventuring author, Ted, who discovers a UFO in the Amazon.  Then a bunch of organizations, the CIA, KGB and of course Nazi's come along and start to hunt Ted.  One of the people hunting Ted is the above pictured cyborg guy.

The movie was directed by a decent director who also directed Django 2, and had real stars also, George Kennedy, Franco Nero, Deborah Moore and Mary Stavin.  You can look up the names and movies yourself.  But Mary Stavin was a Bond girl, and now she was post-Bond which means nudity!  Booyah, bitches.  I do love me some Bond girl nudity.

Top Line is ultimately extremely forgettable, as the opening paragraph hopefully shows you.  To say it was bad would be a mistake though, I think.  It was at least a solid action effort.  This is one of those movies where, if you were in the right mood:  riffing it with friends and beer, it would be a great choice.  It has enough bullshit going on, the real actors are always fun to see as they "slum it up", the effects are pure 80's cheese as seen above, etc.  Don't watch it alone, and don't go in expecting some awesome sci fi movie.  It's actually more of an action or even....yeah, I dunno, adventure.  With a sci fi element.

I'll give it 2.5 stars and I'll also say, I want to see it again.


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