Fair Play - 1972

Wow, christ did this one suck.  I mean really.  However, this is some interesting stuff and perhaps lends clarity to why it was bad.  This was directed by the guy who turned in the nearly incomprehensible Night Fright, James Sullivan.  James Sullivan was also involved in Larry Buchanan's budgetless flick Curse of the Swamp Creature AND Sullivan was the editor on the MST3K favorite Manos: The Hands of Fate!  This guy worked on some total SHIT films!

Fair Play is long, stuffy, boring, and completely worthless.  I am willing to give basically anything about 45 minutes to an hour to get started with it's plot.  I'm willing to sit and be patient, to wait and let the film happen.  I've sat through some movies with barely there plots, with nothing that "happens" or that have a glacial plot movement.  This one, I couldn't.  This one, I tried to fight it, but I ended up fast forwarding a few times.

This movie completely has not entertainment value!  NOTHING fucking happens!  IMDb claims "A young man heads west to visit his uncle F.O. in a town named Fairplay. There a bit of friction between town locals."And I suppose that's true, but that's the thinnest outline of all time first off, and second off this movie is an hour and a half!  More needs to happen.

I was trying to stay awake and I opened my discount store "Emoji Movie Themed" pretzels:

 

This is the sort of shit you find at Grocery Outlet.  I mean, they're still pretzels.  They taste the same.  $1 for the whole big bag, it's a good deal, bruh.

Using my Emoji pretzels, I give this a unique rating of:

That's the frowning Emoji in case you can't tell.  Yeah, these look terrible.