The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies!!? - 1964

 Dear god with this title huh?!  I give it a 10/10 on the Clunk-ometer.

The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies (Mixed Up from now on) was introduced to me on MST3K, and for my review I chose to rewatch the MST episode.

Alternately known as The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies and as The Incredibly Strange Creatures.  This is returning to Ray Dennis Steckler, who directed The Hollywood Strangler, and I did not remember I coined a term in that review called Sub-Z: extremely low budget, below Z grade movies made with no apparent cinematic language.

A few things shave always stood out to me in this movie; number one non ironically I think Steckler in this movie under the name Cash Flagg is a fuckin proto fashion icon.  It's 1964 and everyone else looks like it, while he rocks a black hoodie and black jeans and a short nondescript haircut, and seriously, he looks specifically modern!  This look did not age at all.

Secondly, this movie is so dizzying and so all over the place that it has a bizarre appeal to it that I actually really like.  Some of these that one sees multiple times sort of grow on you, and with MST3K I've rewatched a movie like Manos or Red Zone Cuba or whatever so many times that I start liking the actual movie therein, and this is one of them.  Yeah, its a TON of filler of bad dancing and singing, and yeah, its relatively plotless, but somehow, it just works for me?  Can't say why.

The two segments of the story here take almost an hour to join.  A gypsy woman who can enchant other to do her bidding has people that she takes over kill people, or commit other evil acts.  Meanwhile, Cash Flagg and friends mill around and do nothing until they wander to her circus and get taken over.  Also meanwhile, endless performing arts including comedy, songs, and light T and A stripteases.

This is a weird, weird watch that one really has to be in the mood for.  I like it for what it is, and I might be the only one.  It cannot get a good rating, but I like it.  I'll give it a 3.5

Your Vice is a Locked Room and Only I Have the Key - 1972

 Woof.  Mouthful.  Clunk-Ometer 10/10

The film has been released under several alternative titles, including Gently Before She Dies, Eye of the Black Cat, and Excite Me.

Eye of the Black Cat, because as unconnected as it is, there are allusions in this movie to an evil black cat, which although it has nothing to do with anything, I guess is there?  Excite Me is a decent title.

A reclusive writer and his wife have their maid killed by someone and immediately hide her body because of fear of the police.  Then, the writers niece Floriana arrives and senses something off.  Perhaps for legitimate reasons or perhaps to find out what's going on, Floriana seduces the writers wife and then gets involved with a local racer.  Its a ton of characters I didn't even mention and a lot of dialogue in this convoluted movie with an equally or perhaps more convoluted name.

I've seen this title kick around on various lists, of Italian thrillers of this time, cult movies, etc.  The main actress Edwige Fenech was a sex symbol of her time and has a rockin bod, and was in the somewhat less clunky named The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh.

Confusing plot, lots of stuff going on, some good sex scenes and some decent deaths.  Its a good one, but definitely a vibe movie.  I'll give it 3 stars.

What Have They Done to Your Daughters? - 1974

 

More accurately translated title:  The Police Ask for Help

Clunky man.  The pluralization of daughters, the length of the title obviously.  Why not call it The Police Ask for Help?  

This movie is about a prostitution ring that has a string of deaths happen, and the ambiguous guy on a motorcycle who may be doing it.  It s a police procedural sort of as well, and  is part of the poliziottesco thing which I have touched on here, namely I believe in the Swinging Seventies set.

Its a fine enough story and there's some deaths and some nudity, its mainly a lot of dialogue, and you know, its all whatever I guess.  I don't know what to say about it really.  The poster is better than the movie, I love the extreme cop guy screaming in the background, this looks like a badass surreal exploitation movie, which this is decidedly not.  I'll give it like a two I guess.

For the name, it can get a 2/10 on the Clunk-Ometer

The Slasher ... Is the Sex Maniac! - 1972

 Also known as Penetration and So Sweet, So Dead

"So what motive is there for these crimes?" "I don't know.  Perhaps it could be traced to a homosexual." Reasonable, if you ask me.

I'm tracking down and watching what I'm going to call "clunky named Grindhouse flicks".  The Killer Must Kill Again (or as I saw it, The Dark is Death's Friend) counts.  These should have incredibly convoluted, bizarre and otherwise awful names that you have to think about when you say them.  Sure, its a granted almost for sure that a lot of these are a case of translations.  But, you know, not all of them.  This is a relatively short list that is hard to search for, so we'll see how it goes.

I like the title of this a lot.  I like how its like, a relevatory statement.  "Oh my god, Fred!  I've got it!  The slasher... is the sex maniac!"  You know, if you have a sex maniac on the loose and a slasher on the loose, its a good bet they're the same.  I mean, maybe this was not known in 1972, but I feel like the logic makes sense.

A decidedly not sex maniac is on the loose, killing women who are cheating on their husbands.  The killer is clad in black with a fedora and a women's stocking pulled over his face to make his face obscured.  Its an awesome look, like a mix between Freddy Kruger and I Know What You Did Last Summer (somewhat clunky name there, actually).  The lead cop begins to track him down, it goes from there.

A proto slasher this definitely is.  Killing women with plenty of nudity, a masked killer, a body count, moral related deaths.  Its more of a slasher than a Giallo, as this is much more of a police story than the norm of that genre.  

This is a good, fun, fast paced entry with plenty of kills and nudity to keep you interested.  It isn't that clunky of a title, I'll give it like a 4/10 on the "Clunk-ometer".

The Dark is Death's Friend - 1975

 Also known as The Killer Must Kill Again.

Not to bring up Video Nasty again, but this is crazier than the friggin' Mansion of the Doomed.  This had as much blood as that and this has a rape scenes, so you know, why was this not a Nasty?

I want to try to find a picture of the excessive 70s house that's in this movie.  With a yellow living room that had weird see through plastic columns and designs everywhere, this was something else.  It made me realize that a lot of the Nasties did not feel specifically 70s... or early 80s?  Maybe it was the ridiculous stuff going on in those movies, or maybe just incidental.  Something to think about.

This movie has a killer on the loose get tapped by a man to get rid of the man's wife.  The serial killer tracks her down, rapes and kills her.  He puts the body in his trunk, and soon enough his car gets stolen!  Now the killer is after the people who stole his car, while in the meantime, the police are getting involved in the murder of the wife.

This movie was more of a thriller than a traditional Giallo.  It has no fetishization feel nor wonky electronic score, and instead almost feels like a character study.  In that, it is fun and it moves okay, there is actually not a lot to say about it beyond that early 70s house.  Unfortunately that doesn't retain throughout the movie, otherwise I'd give it an entire star higher.  As is it can have a 2.5

Clunky name, huh?  I give it a 2/10 on the Clunk-ometer

Mansion of the Doomed - 1976

 Also known as The Terror of Dr. Chaney; also known as Massacre Mansion, Eyes, Eyes of Dr. Chaney and House of Blood.  From Wikipedia:  While not prosecuted for obscenity, the film was seized and confiscated in the U.K. under Section 3 of the Obscene Publications Act 1959 during the video nasty panic.

I did not do this on purpose.  What I did was try to find a random movie from 1976 to watch, as I scrolled back through this blog and stumbled upon my goal to watch 76 movies from 1976.  I forgot about it, and no, that is not my next goal.  But crazy huh?  That I accidentally watched another Nasty?

Mansion of the Doomed stars Gypsy's love Richard Baseheart.  Richard is a doctor who has a daughter who has lost her eyes and is now sad and defeated.  He does what any good dad would do, he begins to rip out other peoples eyes to try to restore hers, except it keeps not working.  But he doesn't give up that easy!

They came after this movie?  Yo, this would basically be PG-13 now.  It has some eye gouging and it has some makeup effects to depict people with ripped out eyes.  That's it.  Its very tame.

Long, talky, with okay effects, and nothing else worth noting.  You might forget what happened in the first 20 minutes when you're only at minute 25.  Welcome to the Machine by Pink Floyd was in this??  I must've missed it.  For mostly that fact I guess I'll give this 2 stars.

Video Nasty - 1984

 Also known as the Video Recordings Act of 1984.  See what I did there?  Because they all have alternate names...  get it?

The act passed and these did get seized, that's the whole thing.  And Wikipedia doesn't say about to what degree this happened, or about protest or about the other data points.  But we do know that this was a real thing that happened, and basically hasn't happened since, beyond I guess you cannot watch porn on your phone in certain states now?  Is that the modern equivalent of this?

The complete list of those that faced actual, real prosecution, censorship, and seizure.  With links:

1. Absurd 
2. Anthropophagous: The Beast 
3. Axe 
4. A Bay of Blood
5. The Beast in Heat 
6. Blood Feast 
7. Blood Rites 
8. Bloody Moon 
9. The Burning 
10. Cannibal Apocalypse 
11. Cannibal Ferox
12. Cannibal Holocaust 
13. The Cannibal Man 
14. Devil Hunter
15. Don't Go in the Woods 
16. The Driller Killer 
17. Evilspeak 
18. Exposé
19. Faces of Death 
20. Fight for Your Life 
21. Flesh for Frankenstein 
22. Forest of Fear 
23. Gestapo's Last Orgy
24. The House by the Cemetery 
25. The House on the Edge of the Park 
26. I Spit on Your Grave
27. Island of Death
28. The Last House on the Left 
29. Love Camp 7 
30. Madhouse
31. Mardi Gras Massacre 
32. Nightmares in a Damaged Brain
33. Night of the Bloody Apes
34. Night of the Demon 
35. Snuff 
36. SS Experiment Camp
37. Tenebrae
38. The Werewolf and the Yeti
39. Zombie Flesh Eaters

Like I said at the beginning, I did not rewatch anything.  Can't be bothered, bruh.  If I was going to rewatch anything, it would either be Night of the Demon or Island of Death.  Those two are high in my top 5 most enjoyable Nasties, which I'll put here in no particular order:

Blood Rites

Island of Death

Night of the Demon

The Burning

Flesh for Frankenstein

Top 5 most disturbing:

Faces of Death

The Gestapo's Last Orgy

The House on the Edge of the Park

The Beast in Heat

Fight For Your Life

A strange moment in time, a legendary thing among Grindhouse cult enthusiasts, I'm glad I did this and I'm glad it's over.  Some more movies were in 2 additional lists, with various levels of associated punishment or seizure if you owned them.  From Wikipedia:

Dropped 33
The Beyond (original title: E Tu Vivrai Nel Terrore ‒ L'Aldilà, also known as Seven Doors of Death) — Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with approximately 2 minutes cut in 1987. Re-released uncut in 2001.
The Bogey Man (also known as The Boogeyman) ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema. Released with 44 seconds cut in 1992. Re-released uncut in 2000.
Cannibal Terror (original title: Terreur Cannibale) ‒ Released uncut in 2003.
Contamination ‒ Released uncut in 2004 with a 15 rating.
Dead & Buried ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema. Released with 30 seconds cut in 1990. Re-released uncut in 1999.
Death Trap (also known as Eaten Alive and Starlight Slaughter) ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 25 seconds cut in 1992. Re-released uncut in 2000.
Deep River Savages (original title: Il paese del sesso selvaggio, also known as Man From Deep River) ‒ Originally refused a cinema certificate in 1975. Eventually released with 3 minutes 45 seconds of animal cruelty cuts in 2003, and re-released with 3 minutes of similar cuts in 2016.
Delirium (also known as Psycho Puppet) ‒ Released with 16 seconds cut in 1987. Released uncut in February 2022.
Don't Go in the House ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 3 minutes and 7 seconds cut in 1987. Re-released uncut in December 2011.
Don't Go Near the Park ‒ Released uncut in 2006.
Don't Look in the Basement (also known as The Forgotten) ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released uncut in 2005 with a 15 rating.
The Evil Dead ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with approximately 2 minutes cut in 1990. Re-released uncut in 2001.
Frozen Scream ‒ No UK re-release.
The Funhouse ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema. Released uncut in 1987. Re-classified 15 in 2007.
Human Experiments ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema. No UK re-release.
I Miss You, Hugs and Kisses (also known as Drop Dead Dearest) ‒ Released with 1 minute 6 seconds cut in 1986.
Inferno ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 20 seconds cut in 1993. Re-released uncut in September 2010.
Killer Nun (original title: Suor Omicidi) ‒ Released with 13 seconds cut in 1993. Re-released uncut in 2006.
Late Night Trains (original title: L'ultimo treno della notte, also known as Night Train Murders) ‒ Originally refused a cinema certificate in 1976. Released uncut in 2008.
The Living Dead at the Manchester Morgue (original title: Non si deve profanare il sonno dei morti, also known as Let Sleeping Corpses Lie and Don't Open the Window) ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 1 minute 53 seconds cut in 1985. Re-released uncut in 2002.
Nightmare Maker (also known as Night Warning and Butcher, Baker, Nightmare Maker) ‒ Refused a video certificate in 1987 under the title The Evil Protege. Released uncut in 2024.
Possession ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema. Released uncut in 1999.
Pranks (also known as The Dorm That Dripped Blood and Death Dorm) ‒ Released with 10 seconds cut in 1992.
Prisoner of the Cannibal God (original title: La montagna del dio cannibale, also known as Mountain of the Cannibal God and Slave of the Cannibal God) ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 2 minutes 6 seconds of animal cruelty cuts in 2001, and re-released with 2 minutes of similar cuts in 2018.
Revenge of the Bogey Man (original title: Boogeyman II) ‒ Released in re-edited form with additional footage in 2003.
The Slayer ‒ Released with 14 seconds cut in 1992. Re-released uncut in 2001.
Terror Eyes (also known as Night School) ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 1 minute 16 seconds cut in 1987. Re-released uncut as Night School in 2025.[21]
The Toolbox Murders ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 1 minute 46 seconds cut in 2000. Re-released uncut in 2017.
Unhinged ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema. Released uncut in 2004.
Visiting Hours ‒ Originally passed with cuts for cinema. Released with approximately 1 minute cut in 1986. Passed uncut in 2017.
The Witch Who Came From the Sea ‒ Released uncut in 2006.
Women Behind Bars [fr] (original title: Des diamants pour l'enfer by Jess Franco) ‒ Passed uncut in 2017.
Zombie Creeping Flesh (also known as Hell of the Living Dead, Night of the Zombies and Virus) ‒ Originally passed uncut for cinema in an edited version. Full version released uncut in 2002.

"Section 3" 82

A supplementary list was issued along with the official list, which featured a list of so-called "Section 3 Video Nasties". Titles on the Section 3 list could not be prosecuted for obscenity but were liable to seizure and confiscation under a "less obscene" charge. Tapes seized under Section 3 could be destroyed after distributors or merchants forfeited them.

Abducted (a.k.a. Schoolgirls in Chains) – No UK re-release.
The Aftermath (a.k.a. Zombie Aftermath) – Passed without cuts in 1988 on the Goldcrest video label.
The Black Room – Originally passed uncut for cinema. No UK re-release.
Blood Lust (a.k.a. Mosquito the Rapist) – Passed with heavy cuts for cinema. No UK re-release.
Blood Song – Re-released as Dream Slayer.
Blue Eyes of the Broken Doll – No UK re-release.
Brutes and Savages – No UK re-release.
Cannibal (a.k.a. Ultimo Mondo Cannibale and Last Cannibal World) – Originally passed with heavy cuts for cinema. Released with 2m 46s of cuts in 2003.
Cannibal World (a.k.a. Mondo Cannibale and The Cannibals) – No UK re-release.
The Chant of Jimmie Blacksmith – Passed uncut for cinema in 1978. Released without cuts in 1987.
The Child – Passed uncut for cinema. Released uncut in 2006.
Christmas Evil (a.k.a. You Better Watch Out) – Released uncut in 2012 with a 15 rating.
Communion (a.k.a. Alice Sweet Alice) – Passed uncut for cinema. Passed with 8s of cuts in 1998. Released uncut in 2014.
Dawn of the Dead – Originally passed with heavy cuts for cinema. Passed with cuts for video in 1989 and 1997. Released uncut in 2003.
Dawn of the Mummy – Passed with 27s of cuts for cinema. Passed with 1m 43s of cuts for the video in 1987. Released uncut in 2003.
Dead Kids (a.k.a. Strange Behavior) – Passed with 27s of cuts in 1993 and 2008.
Death Weekend (a.k.a. The House by the Lake) – Passed with cuts for cinema. No UK re-release.
Deep Red (a.k.a. Profondo Rosso) – Passed with 11s of cuts in 1993. The extended version was passed uncut in 2010.
Demented – Released with 1m 19s of cuts in 1987.
The Demons (a.k.a. Les Démons) – A composite version was passed uncut in 2008, and the original version was passed uncut in 2017.
Don't Answer the Phone – Passed with cuts for cinema. An edited version was released without further cuts in 2005.
Eaten Alive! – Passed with heavy cuts for cinema. Passed with heavy cuts for animal cruelty in 1987 and 1992.
Enter the Devil (a.k.a. Disciples Of Death) – No UK re-release.
The Erotic Rites of Frankenstein – Released uncut in the U.K. on 22nd Jan, 2018, with an "18" certificate. [1]
The Evil – No UK re-release.
The Executioner (a.k.a. Massacre Mafia Style) – No UK re-release.
Final Exam – Released uncut in 1986.
Foxy Brown – Passed in edited form for cinema. Passed with 2m 48s of cuts in 1987. Released with previous cuts waived in 1998.
Friday the 13th – The R-rated version was released without cuts in 1987. The full unrated version (previously released for cinema) was released uncut in 2003.
Friday the 13th Part 2 – The R-rated version was passed uncut in 1987. Downgraded to an uncut 15 certificate in 2008.
GBH (a.k.a. Grievous Bodily Harm) – No UK re-release.
Graduation Day – Passed uncut in 1986. Downgraded to an uncut 15 certificate in 2003.
Happy Birthday to Me – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1986. Downgraded to an uncut 15 certificate in 2004.
The Headless Eyes – No UK re-release.
Hell Prison (a.k.a. Escape from Hell) – No UK re-release.
The Hills Have Eyes – Passed with cuts for cinema. Passed with 2s of cuts for video in 1987. Released uncut in 2003.
Home Sweet Home – Released uncut in 2004.
Honeymoon Horror – No UK re-release.
Inseminoid – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1987. Downgraded to a 15 certificate in 2005.
Invasion of the Blood Farmers – No UK re-release.
The Killing Hour (a.k.a. The Clairvoyant) – Originally passed uncut for cinema. Passed with 1m 19s of cuts in 1986.
The Last Horror Film (a.k.a. Fanatic) – Passed with cuts for cinema. An edited version was released in 2003.
The Last Hunter – Passed uncut for cinema. Passed with 8s of cuts in 1988. Released uncut in 2002.
The Love Butcher – No UK re-release.
Mad Foxes – No UK re-release.
Mark of the Devil – Passed with heavy cuts for cinema. Passed with cuts in 1998 and 2003. Released uncut in 2013.
Martin – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1994.
Massacre Mansion (a.k.a. Mansion of the Doomed) – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1992. Downgraded to an uncut 15 certificate in 2000.
Mausoleum – Released uncut in 1987.
Midnight – Passed uncut for cinema. An edited version was released in 1993. Full version passed uncut in 2011.
Naked Fist (a.k.a. Firecracker) – Passed with 3m 53s of cuts for cinema. No UK re-release.
The Nesting – Passed uncut in 1986.
The New Adventures of Snow White (a.k.a. Grimm Fairy Tales for Adults) – No UK re-release.
Nightbeast – Passed uncut in 1996.
Night of the Living Dead – Passed with cuts for cinema. Released uncut in 1987. Downgraded to a 15 certificate in 2007. Now in the public domain.
Nightmare City (a.k.a. City of the Walking Dead) – Passed with 3m 5s of cuts in 1986. Released uncut in 2003.
Oasis of the Zombies – Passed uncut in 2004 with a 15 certificate.
Parasite – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1993.
Phantasm – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1989. Downgraded to a 15 certificate in 2005.
Pigs (a.k.a. Daddy's Deadly Darling) – Released by 88 Films in 2016. Unknown if cut.
Prey – Passed with 11s of cuts for cinema and video. A print shortened for dialogue was passed uncut in 2004.
Prom Night – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1987.
Rabid – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1992.
Rosemary's Killer (a.k.a. The Prowler) – Passed with cuts for cinema. Released uncut in 2007.
Savage Terror (a.k.a. Primitives) – No UK re-release.
Scanners – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1987.
Scream for Vengeance! – No UK re-release.
Shogun Assassin – Passed with cuts for cinema. Released uncut in 1999.
Street Killers (a.k.a. Beast with a Gun) – No UK re-release.
Suicide Cult (a.k.a. The Astrologer) – No UK re-release.
Superstition (a.k.a. The Witch) – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1986.
Suspiria – Passed with cuts for cinema. Released uncut in 1998.
Terror – Passed with cuts for cinema. Released uncut in 1997.
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre — Refused a cinema certificate in 1975. Passed uncut in 1999.
The Thing – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1987.
Tomb of the Living Dead (a.k.a. Mad Doctor of Blood Island) – Passed with cuts for cinema. Released with 42s of animal cruelty cuts in 2003.
The Toy Box – No UK re-release.
Werewolf Woman – Passed with cuts for cinema. Scheduled for a re-release on Blu-Ray in February 2026.
Wrong Way – No UK re-release.
Xtro – Passed uncut for cinema. Also passed uncut for video in 1987. Downgraded to an uncut 15 certificate in 2007.
Zombie Holocaust – Passed uncut in 2000.
Zombie Lake – Passed uncut in 2004.

Huge man.  Just enormous.  What a bizarre situation.

Fight For Your Life - 1977

 I actually had to spend $1.99, but I finally finished all of the Video Nasties.

William Sanderson stars in this late 70s exploitation blaxsploitation flick.  Three guys; a Mexican, a Asian, and a white man follow a black woman home and begin to terrorize her family.  Things gradually escalate from forced meal time and verbal abuse to rape and violence.

In this movie, there's basically Nazisploitation level wall to wall depravity.  Now I say that and I wonder if because one is sexual exploit of women and one is general exploit of black people, I am more uncomfortable with this, because what, I approve of exploiting women?  Because they're fuckin' nude in the movies and I'm a man and I'm like hell yeah?  I guess we all have our own barometers for how we interpret these things.

Basically 10 minutes of intro, 45 minutes or so of a escalating hostage sequence, leading to upheaval and eventual confrontation, this is a very black and white movie.  It doesn't have much nuance to it, and instead it makes up for it with language.

Was this one on the Nasty list for language?  N and C words fly left to right all over this script, and I ain't talkin about Cunt.  Its a bit extreme and the hatred feels quite real, and man, I mean its not fun really.  

The end of the confrontation is decent and we get our revenge, so you know.  It is what it is.  I guess.

Argument against Video Nasty.

2/10 on the Nasty Meter, for language only.

Axe - 1974

Also known as Lisa, Lisa.

Director Friedel recalled that the production sought to extend individual scenes "by any means possible" to give the film a longer running time.  Oh really?  Perhaps that could explain the like 8 minute scene where the main girl gives her dads shoulder a partial spongebath and then puts shaving cream on his beard only to seemingly decide not to shave him and rub it off?

This is a extremely minimal, barely bones story as indicated above.  I guess the idea here is rape revenge, you know that whole thing, and after about 30 minutes you get that setup finally, but wow!  Yeah, this just dawdles around doing nothing for many many moments of the film.

Young woman Lisa lives with her disabled grandfather.  Her grandfather can just sit there, he doesn't move and doesn't speak, and she takes care of him.  That's when three mobsters show up and announce they want her to let them stay in the house.  She pushes back and they ignore her.  She goes to the backroom and is contemplating suicide, but is interrupted, goes upstairs and goes to sleep, and one of them comes in to rape her.  During the rape she slashes his neck.

One could dump on the level of incompetence in this.  Its so badly recorded, its so poorly acted in dismal nonemotional line readings.  It has major plot movement issues and was paper thin to begin with.  And overall, nothing is explained or even hinted at...  Several of the things you think are going to happen don't, and its a shame because for me at least, I imagined some cool shit!

It's hard to judge this as a real movie, because it does not seem like one.  Again, this is more the type of nonsense I expected from Video Nasty, except where is the Nasty?  No nudity, the rape scenes are pretty tame, barely any blood...  I mean, this is barely R, there's a chance this is PG-13 these days.

Argument against Video Nasty

0/10 on the Nasty Meter.

Devil Hunter - 1980

Also known as The Man Hunter, Mandingo Manhunter, The Cannibal and Sexo Caníbal.

I recently went to a "mystery horror movie night" at the local Magic Lantern Theater in Spokane WA.  They played Jesus Franco's The Diabolical Dr. Z, which I was going to review cause it suits the blog, but I never did.  What I was surprised about was how good it was.  Sure, there were some really bizarre moments and the scripting wasn't good, but the cinematography was pulling elements from German expressionism, and the potential was all there.  Its strange that Franco went so far from that into this and things like Oasis of the Zombies.

Devil Hunter is one of these movies where you're watching it and whether you're paying attention or not, you're sorta like, "what's going on here?  who is that?  what's the plot to this movie?"  and given that, it's also a time checker.  You'll be looking before the 30 minute mark to see how much of this plotless, messy schlock is left.

Wikipedia and IMDb both say a short blurb sentence about a model who is kidnapped in the jungle, and a guy sent to rescue her and confronting cannibals.  Yeah, I mean I guess.  There are certainly cannibals, and there are also indigenous tribes that dance around showing tribal nudity.  There's a lot of this in who knows sorta "plot" movements, and holy crap does it go on for way too long.  This is 105 minutes when it should've pulled a Blood Feast and been just barely an hour.

The thought I had while watching this was all these movies going to South America or the Philippines or wherever to film the tribal stuff.  What did those people think?  I mean, I doubt they were practicing tribal nudity at this time - some places in Africa and maybe really remote tribes were maybe, but like did they know what was being filmed, did they understand that they were being depicted as cannibals, etc? 

I’m not trying to bring woke into this, more about wondering what exactly was the interaction here- when they asked these women if they wanted to be in a movie, and I guess the women said yes, and then they said” take off your clothes and dance around like an idiot,” What exactly did they think was going on? Especially when a camera was literally aimed at their crotch? I wonder if that’s part of the Video Nasty thing with some of these cannibal movies and the like, is that they knew that these people had been exploited. They were like, "bro you went to some Third World country and paid these people basically no money to act like cannibals and be sexualized? Come on, dude!"  I guess that is the definition of exploitation though, it is how these are labeled.

So this is too long, but there is a point about 80 minutes in where just about all the characters are naked, there's hazy gauze all over the camera, the sound effects are echo-ey and strange, the breasts and vulvas are being zoomed in on by the camera, and weird slow motion shit is happening and what can I say... it fucking rules.  Its incredible.  It reminded me a lot of Oasis of the Zombies, which I gave 1 star to in 2015.  That is a movie I legitimately still think about 11 years later for evoking such a weird and specific feeling that honestly I haven't felt in anything but Franco's work.  I have to give credit, it grabs ya, and it reminds me of the things I liked in the Blind Dead series.

I will give this a 2.5, I guess.  Near pornography levels of nudity and some light cannibal fare, this is kinda a hard R by today but it's not that crazy for Nasty.

Argument slightly against Video Nasty

Nasty Meter 2/10

The Beast in Heat - 1977

Also known as SS Hell Camp, SS Experiment Part 2 and Horrifying Experiments of SS Last Days.

Back to Nazi-sploitation, I couldn't find this for a while except on porn sites, and randomly today I found it on YouTube for free.  Win.

What we have here is nothing terribly new.  A female Nazi doctor who has lesbian leanings has a creepy badass monster freak human in a cage.  She feeds it nonstop aphrodisiacs and drugs, dementing it into a psycho savage state, and she brings in a women to have the beast rape them.  Usually this takes the form of sexual violence and/or the murder of the woman during the affair.  

Aside from this, a group of soldiers make their way across the Reich on an effort of freeing prisoners.  And this is where the film really splits, because the two parts of this do not feel connected at all.  What we have here is basically sex and craziness for 30 minutes, soldiers in battle for 15, and then repeat both segments.  When we cut to the soldiers it really does feel like we're cutting to another movie, or at least nowhere close to the first part, and its incongruent as all hell.

The extremity of this movie is high.  I was thinking that nothing in these Nasties had topped the sexual depravity of Blood Sucking Freaks (how the hell did that escape Video Nasty?) but this film managed to do it.  There are scenes of nipple torture in this, like in that movie, as well as electrodes attached to labia and around vaginas, with vaginal torture?! Also a scene where the beast rips a woman's pubic hair off and eats it?  I mean, this is a new level of sexual violence.

It's boundary pushing while the plot is nothing.  Its horrifying while its dreadfully dull and way too fucking long.  Its a rel mixed bag, The Beast in Heat.  It pushed some envelopes so I guess I'll give it a 3.5

Argument for Video Nasty

Nasty Meter 10/10

Madhouse - 1981

 Also known as There Was a Little Girl and And When She Was Bad.

The alternate names here come from some poem I'll throw in for content:

"There was a little girl who had a little curl, right in the middle of her forehead. When she was good, she was very, very good, and when she was bad, she was horrid."

Madhouse is a way too common name guys, come on.  I had to dig to unearth this one.  Also, I'm getting kinda close here!  I think there's like 3 of these Nasties left.  Thankfully, tbh.  I feel about done.

Madhouse has a cool killer dog that mauls some people, and this is in relation to a psychotic priest who is on a killing spree.   We have a kid death, we have some cool neck tearing scenes.  Slowly, we whittle it down to final girl Julia and Father James with his badass vicious Rottweiler. 

This is a lot like a normal slasher, and likely the dog attacks and the end killing of the dog got it on the Nasty list.  Pretty decent slasher, it's definitely is going for the "wacky killer" thing, which drags it down a tiny bit.  Relatively calm by today's standards, this fits into the "why is this on the Nasty list?"

Argument against Video Nasty

Nasty Meter 1/10

Exposé - 1976

 Also known as House on Straw Hill and Trauma.

Udo Kier is back, this time as a British alcoholic writer in this strange sex thriller.  Exposé is the story of him getting a new sexy assistant.  On her way to the job she is randomly raped, and hunts the guys down promptly.  Kier then starts trying to seduce her, and fails.  He resorts to his usual fling, Suzanne, while his new assistant begins to disconnect from reality.

This is a relatively minimal film, which in general I like a lot usually.  This one is not going to eschew that trend.  It has an A to B, direct story, and has a bit of the paranoia thriller bent to it.  The rape scene is mild in comparison to something like I Spit on Your Grave, and the violence is kinda just a whatever thing.  Not even a lot of blood in this one.

This fits into the whole realm of "why was this a Video Nasty?"  I guess a rape scene is pushing the envelope, but its not mixed with a lot of sexual violence, and its not that long or explicit.  There's some light blood n stuff, but yeah.  A mild R by today's standards.  I give this a solid 3 stars.

Argument against Video Nasty

Nasty Meter 2/10

A Bay of Blood - 1971

Also known as Chain Reaction, Carnage, Twitch of the Death Nerve and Blood Bath.

Mario Bava directs this surprisingly un-giallo and definitely another proto-slasher, Bay of Blood. This methodical horror movie is centered around a local bay, and a seeming unrelated series of killings that take place there.

Pretty small plot, pretty fun movie. The main kills in this are machete kills with lots of blood, and it’s as fun as it sounds. Lots. Decent effects and a cool face chopping scene, plenty of kills and some nudity, I mean what do ya need here?

I don’t have a ton to say. It didn’t stick out in any way as a Video Nasty. I’m kinda tired. 4 stars.

Argument against Video Nasty

1/10 in the Nasty Meter

Blood Feast - 1963

 It would not be a list of controversial films without the godfather of gore himself Herschell Gordon Lewis. 

This man, shocking as it is, has not been on the blog?! Lewis directed the usual nudie cuties before getting into horror, and he was trying specifically to show what Alfred Hitchcock had not. That was his goal, as I read about this movie on wikipedia. 

Blood Test was also known as Egyptian Blood Fest, and has all the hallmarks of what I more expected to see on the Video Nasty list. One take, unlit, non professional actors hamming it up in essentially plotless, artless films. Not to say Blood Feast is a bad movie. From what I’ve seen of Lewis, he is able to dig into that “slimy fun” aspect that can be had and make it funny. 

This is probably what created cult film. I mean sure, German expressionism and sex in film and other things had people seeking out specific things before this, but films like Rocky Horror, which is perhaps the most popular cult film, are  drafting off this. The “hokeyness” specifically, the ridiculousness. Characters that are outrageous and bizarre, that if they had a mustache would literally twirl it.  

It’s barely over an hour long. To start with. And the plot, I mean is this a plot? A woman goes to the butcher and says they want a “special party” and the butcher says he recommends an Egyptian Feast. He kills a girl and rips out her tongue. He books another feast. He kills another girl. That continues.

This could barely last 10 minutes longer, as it is you might check the clock as I did a few times.  There is one concept here, and its not one with much in the way of legs.  On the Nasty list for the gore and some cannibalism, I get it, especially for 1963.  I give it probably 3.5 stars.

Argument for Video Nasty

3/10 on the Nasty Meter

I Spit on Your Grave - 1978

 Also known as Day of the Women.

I should have maybe ranked the "well known" Nasties, and if I had, this would have clearly been up there as well known.  This and The Last House on the Left both somehow broke through a little bit, and I'm sure that the many many full nude scenes and sex scenes had something to do with it.  Interesting that around the time before there was anything truly pornographic in theaters, there were already films with heavy sexual violence.  I think that absolutely says something about the creature known as the human being.

Jennifer is on a writing retreat somewhere by a river and is being bothered by the locals.  They ogle her, they are loud.  Its fairly innocent until 20 minutes in they start to bother her while she's on her boat.  They tie a rope to her boat, tow her to shore, and collectively rape her over the next 30 or so minutes, taking turns and changing locations, and even heavily implying anal rape.  Direct references were removed by censors, it did in fact used to be explicit.

Beaten, defeated, raped, Jennifer tracks them down with vengeance in mind.  I mean, the thing about this movie is that it was critically panned and called the most vile or violent or hateful or whatever movie of all time when it was released.  It is pretty light on gore, there's a penis chopping scenes that is sorta the worst of it, which is truly something that I can't watch, not to sound like a little bitch.

Extremely well acted, linear, small in scope, and without much else to focus on, this is actually quite well made.  You obviously have like 30 something minutes of sexual violence, and if that isn't for you, well its a deal breaker.  Its not that it seems quaint specifically now, its just that thankfully it is the least professionally done aspect of the film, it seems almost comedic in acting and some of the depiction - lots of overacting on the males parts.  So...I dunno, what I'm saying is freakily enough I have seen worse.

Argument for Video Nasty.

5/10 on the Nasty Meter.

Cannibal Apocalypse - 1980

 Also known as Apocalypse Tomorrow, and Invasion of the Flesh Hunters.

Man was I confused starting this, because this has one of the guys from Cannibal Ferox in it and I was tricked into thinking I had watched this one already!  

This movie starts with a helicopter landing in an unknown foreign land and I steel myself for more tribal cannibal nonsense.  But it quickly steers away from that, and I sorta sat up and paid attention.  This is...oddly enough...a compelling drama?  And a movie sorta about PTSD?  And a virus movie?  What is this?

Charles Bukowski (what the fuck?  he is just named the exact name of the writer, at a time when the writer was still alive?) is rescued from the tribe after eating human flesh.  He returns to the real world and at first it seems he has broken to some degree, can't hack it.  He attacks a woman in a theater and gets chased by a gang, shoots one of them in self defense.  This all spirals into a hostage situation and it quickly becomes apparent that the cannibalism in this movie is treated as a virus, ala zombies, once you get bitten you transmit the craving to the next guy.

With John Saxon as a cop who gets the virus, this had good actors and an original idea.  It caught me and enraptured me in the beginning with the hostage stuff, but to be honest it does go a bit downhill after that.  It just feels a little bit rinse and repeat after about minute 30, as it just becomes more people getting turned - nothing else really happens that's new.

There's a few slightly grisly leg chopping scenes, there's a couple guts n whatever.  Relatively light in the Video Nasty realm.

In the argument "for" or "against" the concept of Video Nasty, this is very slightly "against"

On the Nasty Meter, I give this a 1/10

Cannibal Holocaust - 1980

 My friends and I used to endlessly riff on the title of of a book "Controversy Creates Cash" by Eric Bischoff.  Everytime something iffy would happen we'd look at each other and say the title.  Does it?  And more importantly, why did it once do that, and possibly arguably not do it now?

This is the question that several of these movies has made me think of, but since currently Cannibal Holocaust is making me ask it, it gets this intro.  There's a scene of real animal killing, followed by a rape scene and murder scene with frontal female nudity.  Nothing new for these Video Nasties, but gruesome, controversial, and at the time, cash creating.  Nowadays a real animal killed on screen is still legal, but the fuckin controversy would push 99% AWAY from it instead of towards it.  Why?  Why was that at one point a curious morbid interest and not anymore?

This rewatch of the infamous Italian movie was generally fine.  This is still not my genre, and luckily I've been in the Video Nasty realm for a little while so this didn't feel all that bad.  It has wall to wall violence and gore and nudity, it has aforementioned animal deaths on screen, it has cannibalism scenes.  It has sexual violence and rape.  The rest.  Also, as shouted out in this blog before, a great soundtrack.

Interestingly enough, I am less and less convinced that the Video Nasties were that extreme.  In the defense this movie used against its many legal issues, they cited Apocalypse Now as having animal cruelty scenes that were not prosecuted.  With films like Caligula, Salo, Texas Chainsaw, and yeah Apocalypse Now, how the hell did the prosecution have anything to say?  Its all about tone, and its all about that keyword that this entire genre got mounted with:  "Exploitation".  There's a scene of them killing and dismembering a turtle in here, for example, pretty much just to do it, for no purpose.  

A sort of "found footage" movie, a group finds a video of filmmakers going to the Amazon and finding a local tribe of cannibals.  They interact with the tribe and they find cocaine which they begin to use.  This all culminates in the white people raping and killing locals, which the locals take revenge for.

I feel like this was a little bit better than I thought it was, but thoughts aside this is still just like....not for me.  I recognize the value I guess, and I give it a whatever I dunno 3 stars.

Argument for Video Nasty

Nasty Meter 7/10

Snuff - 1975

Upon its release at the National Theatre in New York City with a $4 ticket price, Snuff grossed $66,456 in its first week.  In New York, it outgrossed One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest for three consecutive weeks.

Its staggering how successful a lot of these were, and perhaps it was numbers like these that led in part to the Video Nasty list.  If this was so successful than that means a lot of people were seeing it, and what were we going to do if people saw this film?  Surely they would grow up to do the same horrendous actions depicted in the film.

I wanted to write about this film though because in a way, a few of these films in the Video Nasties have touched on the idea of trauma, and this is one of them.  One of the women who is in this film has a truly awful story about being raped by a neighbor when she was just a young girl, and having such anger at the man who victimized her.  The mastermind character in this movie manipulates her to take out that anger on the person he chooses, and uses her in that way but still, the trauma is acknowledged.  

Interestingly, its still not something we see talked about in movies now, despite being the obvious "reason" behind things like serial killers, etc.  For how popular true crime has become, you just would think it would be a huge plot point.

This movie is about some Manson-esque charismatic leader named Satan.  He has a group of women that are in his harem, and he makes them attack people.  That's about it, and it certainly leans into the demented side of things, that bizarre esoteric genre sort of known as psychotronic.  

This movie is definitely a vibe change from the last couple, a ton more fun.  It's a lot more of the campy weirdness going on, there's a bit more plot.  There's a clash of tones, there's fun nudity, there's B movie acting.  This is a welcome change, I have to really say.  Somehow it just feels fun again, and maybe cause I took the Nazi, psuedo-documentary and cannibal excursion.  This movie is a breath of fresh air right now.  For that its not awesome or good, but I give it a 3.5

Nasty-Meter:  5/10

Argument:  Mildly for Video Nasty

Cannibal Ferox - 1981

 Also known as Make Them Die Slowly and as Woman from Deep River.

"Do you realize it's us?  The so-called civilized people who are responsible for their cruelty. "  And in this movie it is, which I guess makes it at least somewhat different and/or accurate depending on your point of view.  Called "the most violent film ever made". Cannibal Ferox was also dubiously claimed to be "banned in 31 countries".

Some people are visiting the Amazons and find some drug smugglers there.  The drug smugglers are abusing cocaine and forcing a tribe to harvest the drug for them.  The evil and coke-sniffing Mike goes off the deep end and turns into a sadistic killer, mutilating and slaughtering some of the local tribes, which brings out the savage in them to return the favor.

Part of the giant cannibal craze in Italy at this time, at least this one had a semblance of a plot.  If my memory of Cannibal Holocaust holds up, that one was a lot more plotless.  I also don't mind making the white guy the villain, versus the other norm of this genre in general:  the sadistic unexplained Indigenous tribe.  

Banned for animal cruelty, tribal nudity, a couple cannibalism scenes, and some infamous penis chopping scenes, this was certainly controversial in plenty of places.  I think I said in my review of one of those Zombie movies that I prefer zombies over cannibals, and that held true.  This is pretty much much unremarkable from any other of the genre.  If you like the genre its fine, there ain't nothing here to write home about tho.

Argument "For Video Nasty"

Nasty-Meter:  8/10

Mr. and Mrs. Smith - 2005

 As we put this thing on I told my girlfriend that I remembered it coming out and that I didn't deign to see it as this was the height of my "art film only" phase.  

The thing about this movie is mainly this:  we are in such dire circumstances now that this seems really fun and better in retrospect than it probably did at the time.  Real actors, sharing the same space, in real sets, with real effects, and with actual squibs and liquid fake blood - nowadays this is all CGI.  Its just insane that this was likely shot on film paying A list movie stars the height of their billing asks, it was all done practically and filmed in LA, like this sort of film just does not exist now, every aspect of this has changed.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith are both secretly assassins, they're married to each other and hit a rocky patch in their relationship, and eventually learn the truth about each other.  They are set against each other and fight, only to get turned on and begin to fall back in love, team up and take on the other assassins of the world.  

The movie moves well.  There was a moment early on when internally my head said, "okay I get it with the setup, move into the actual plot" and it did moments later.  This is oldschool Hollywood in a lot of ways, such as even the direction by not an auteur, just classic journeyman direction style of Doug Liman who quietly has what like 5 of the better undersung action movies of the last 25 years?

I appreciate that this era was what it was now, when everything is overblown and over budget despite being all shot on green screen with actors Zooming in their entire part and yet somehow it goes $100 million over budget?  I mean seriously, how did things get so bad so fast...a question we're all asking these days, about many things.  This isn't like the best movie ever, not even great among its peers but it's a fine Tuesday night thing to watch with a few glasses of wine, like I did.  I give it 3 stars.

Faces of Death - 1978

 I was going to go on some tirade about this genre, went to Wikipedia, and apparently these are still being made, even with a "re-imagining" coming out this year.  Also known as The Original Faces of Death.

What this was was nearly inconceivable at the time.  This is almost the pure definition of exploitation.  Real footage of actual dead people, real dead bodies, purportedly "real" deaths live on screen, animal abuse and cruelty, and so on.  On screen, at your theater.  Banned from a reported 46 countries, do they get crazier than this?

We start with a super gruesome surgery scene, and you have to admit, like this is a fucking challenge.  The insanity of the surgery scenes in these movies are really something to me as a take away 25 films into this.  That's my count?  I hadn't done inventory in a while so that's kinda nice, but yo, the surgery scenes are legit disturbing.  In my youth I would have watched with the type of morbid curiosity people speak of when they say in stupefied awe "it's like watching a car crash".  I can genuinely say, partially from experience, not interested.  I don't watch, I look away.  And in the case of this movie, I don't watch, I look away.

Animal cruelty and sadistic acts don't bother me, tribal exploitation doesn't bother me, as well as supposed "eating brains" and other exploitative material.  But real footage of the aftermath of a car accident or a very recent plane crash, one cannot help but to grimace a little bit and take in a breath.  Maybe wince or look away, even. Which is to say, in my classic film review way, if its effective nearly 50 years after it's release, it works....just like, does that mean its good?

I watched the movie "Into The Wild" recently after just recently asking my girlfriend "if a movie is affecting emotionally does that mean it is a good movie?"  Into The Wild has extremely self indulgent, irrelevant moments and it is just not a very good movie about a really compelling and emotionally engaging subject.  This movie is sort of the same.  Its almost impossible to not be effected by something like this, but does that mean its good?  No, and that's the bizarre thing about art.  

I do get what this is trying to do.  It's trying to blend fact with fiction, for both shock value but also a provocateur of thought.  It'll have a detached narrator witnessing something barbaric and it'll say "Despite being the most intelligent creature, mankind is also the most inconsistent" and it's kinda like, you're not wrong, I get that.  It is interesting the fragile and tenuous link between life and death, and we are pretty inconsistent with whether we value or don't value existence.  Suicide, death sentences, cult rituals, many other examples of things in every day life in which life is either near over-valued or thrown away in casual disregard.  We cannot necessarily say right or wrong...we are just to take note, and move on.

What else would a documentary about death look like?  Well, it might not be trying to provoke, one might suggest.  But I don't say that in an argument that this is "wrong" morally or otherwise.  What is weird about this film in particular is with all that said, there are hokey moments aplenty and the fiction they represent is ridiculous.  Those make for parts of this to be insanity, and silly beyond most films, while the other parts are horribly scarring and like nothing else.

A strong argument "For Video Nasty"

I give this a 10/10 on the Nasty Meter.  

I guess I'll give it a 2.5?  I have absolutely no idea what to rate this.

Update a few days later:  

I keep thinking about this movie, and particularly in one specific way.  This movie makes you think, and it does not make you think from asking high level questions or even making suggestions, stating an opinion, doing anything.  By shoving fact and fiction in front of you, it makes you think about such broad topics like mythology, cultural values, cultural differences, the value of life, the rituals and the idiosyncrasies of human beings and their thoughts.  Religion, certainly.  

I think the criticism here would be that it asks these questions in a defiant, childish, and immature way.  But who am I to say this is wrong?  Art does not need to be "representational" in order to work.  It does not need to be high minded, eloquent, or even polished.  Those who need these questions asked in specific cadence with specific nuance should ask themselves why they do not accept a very poignant question, which they themselves cannot ask in polite society, to be asked to them in that way. Is it because you don't want to be confronted?  Is it because it takes you out of your comfort zone?  Is it because when it boils down to it, you can only accept certain answers to certain questions?  

This is all my thoughts on Faces of Death, which is not a masterpiece, but if it can illicit this response.... well... you know the rest.