Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Evil Clutch - 1988

Originality aside, sometimes you have to like a movie.  Yes, this movie was not original.  And yes, I liked it.  Fuck y'all.  I read about 4 reviews of this online, as I sometimes do, and everyone's bad mouthing it for being an Evil Dead rip-off.  Whatever man, I dunno.  Sure, it have some copied elements from the Evil Dead.  First person monster cam, the moon fogging over, ample blood and guts.  But what this movie has more than that is a fast paced, sporadic, regular horror movie kind of a feel.

Wandering lovers pick up a hitch-hiker in the beginning of this movie.  We know that's not going to end well.  She is of course evil, and has a giant hand like monster that comes out of her vagina.  I love how in horror movie reviews everyone doesn't want to say that.  WTF.  The movie is rated R, we're all fucking adults here, and saying the word "vagina" still isn't like "allowed"?  Just say she has a fucking vagina monster!  I hate it when people say things like "nether regions" or "private area" like what are you, 5 years old?!

So, in addition to vagina monster lady, there is weird white faced zombie guy, and there's also plenty of gore in the movie.  The gore in the movie is decently done, surprisingly.  There's not loads of it, but there is enough to keep a gorehound happy.  The whole movie was perhaps not lit well or it could be the quality of the transfer (again, this is a Troma release, and they don't exactly scream quality in most cases) but the movie is hard to look at.  Luckily, Troma wasn't the actual company that made it or I'm sure it would be a lot worse.

One thing I will say about this movie is that is has a lot more throat-y yelling in it than just about anything else I've reviewed on this blog.  Take that as bad or good I guess.  I take it as bad because it is really annoying.  Like seriously, there's this one sequence where the girl is about 50 feet away from the monster, getting away, has no need to scream.  But she just keeps going!  "aaaah!  AHHHHHHH!  aaaaaaaaaaaaH!"  Like dude bitch, shut the fuck up!

Problems aside, I liked this.  Sure, it's not the adrenaline ride some movies are.  But something is always going on in this, the setting and the actors and the effects are good, and the music is awesome.  It's energetic, feels very relaxed in atmosphere.  Like a good, solid, 80's movie in other words.  I challenge many other rip-off horror films to get to that level.  Most movies that were coming out were too boring, not interesting, had no effects, etc.  This compared to say, most of the other 80's horror I've reviewed:  this one wins hands down.  At least there wasn't long points of bland dialogue by bad actors.

I feel like it's gotten a terrible rap, and being that it is only somewhat unoriginal, I think it deserves a view.  I'd show this on a bad film night any day of the week.  I give it 3 stars.

Side note:  I realized as I was watching it that very thing I was just discussing:  the idea of watching this, or any other movie with someone.  I know it's pretty irrelevant, but I tend to look at movies that way.  As a solo watcher, I know what movies I would definitely never put on if someone else were with me.  And I know which ones I would put on.  I think it's just interesting that movies are rated on that level.  Of course it makes sense, most people aren't alone.  Most people have friends, relationships, parents, etc.. And of course a movie doesn't care if you're alone or with a group of 50.
I dunno.  This may just seem like a random thought, but I thought it was interesting.

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